Bewildering

 

Walang tigil ang gulo sa aking pag-iisip
Mula nang tayo'y nagpasyang maghiwalay
Nagpaalam 'pagkat hindi tayo bagay
Nakapagtataka hooh...

This morning, I woke up to the sound of a man singing “Nakapagtataka.” I winced as I thought it was too early for videoke. I grudgingly got out of bed, sat on its edge and stared at nothingness for a few seconds., then meditated on why a man would choose to sing a breakup song at this time, when the day was just starting, bringing with it the promise of unlimited blessings to the faithful.

Kung bakit ganito ang aking kapalaran
'Di ba't ilang ulit ka nang nagpaalam
At bawat paalam ay puno ng iyakan
Nakapagtataka, nakapagtataka

Hindi ka ba napapagod
O 'di kaya nagsasawa
Sa ating mga tampuhang
Walang hanggang katapusan

I went downstairs, went straight to the kitchen and made myself coffee, black, no cream, no sugar, and unlike James Bond’s martini, stirred, not shaken.

Napahid ng mga luha
Damdamin at puso'y tigang
Wala nang maibubuga
Wala na 'kong maramdaman

I sat on a chair, there’s fried rice on the table, some fried eggs and fried fish while the man continued to channel Hajji Alejandro. In fairness, he could carry a tune well. And wait, he’s not on videoke, he was accompanied not by a horrendous karaoke instrumentation but by a single guitar, a jangly one.

Kung tunay tayong nagmamahalan
 Ba't 'di tayo magkasunduan ohh...

I went to the windows and realized that it was a blind man busking in the streets, accompanied by another man, seeking alms, and my annoyance disappeared.

Walang tigil ang ulan at nasaan ka araw
Napa'no na ang pag-ibig sa isa't isa
Wala na bang nananatiling pag-asa
Nakapagtataka, saan na napunta

Hindi ka ba napapagod
O 'di kaya nagsasawa
Sa ating mga tampuhang
Walang hanggang katapusan

I went back to the kitchen and to my coffee while my sister rushed outside to hand the busker some alms. And I’ve always thought that being blind was the most difficult disability one can have…

Kung tunay tayong nagmamahalan
Ba't 'di tayo magkasunduan ohh...

…and confused lovers, unfortunate.

Now, I’m looking forward to the day where sad, painful breakup songs would always be out of fashion.

Love conquers all, doesn't it? It conquers fears, doubts, hate, anxiety, paranoia and sadness. One day, it will probably conquer gravity, too.

Jeez, drinking black coffee always makes me philosophical.

 

 

 

 

 

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